Saturday, October 19, 2024

Con te Partiro: A Farewell for Marian

 


It's been a week since Mar left us. I just lost 22+ years of sisterhood with her. I couldn't write a concise tribute until now when everything is sinking in and after reading back our chats. They were a mix of funny and melodramatic topics: about our kids, food, health, prayer, and even chismis (gossip haha!). Videocalls were an even crazier mix.

So far, I have only delivered three eulogies. I'm not so fond of eulogies because I've always believed that all the good stuff you say should be articulated while they're alive. This year, I have had people in my circle leave too soon. I hope the Lord will not add more.

I would like to fondly remember Marian as her sister-in-law from her only brother. Because of her, I met my Eziel. Marian and I became friends first through our church's youth camp. Those were happy youthful days. We watched concerts, and movie premieres, and went on road trips. Those were the highlights of our younger years together. 

Mar was generous, always paying for our adventures. During those years, she had stints at Repertory Philippines. It was fun witnessing her God-given excellence in her craft while acting onstage. 

To many of you, she was a great friend, performer, church worker, music teacher, and many other wonderful things. 

But to me, she was just Marian, a perfectly flawed family member, like all of us with wrong decisions and mistakes. Again, like all of us. I like that she still confided in me even if I made her face some hurtful truths about life issues. 

Eziel and I encouraged her to be healthy and fit. There was even a time when Mar and I went to the gym. But I guess she tried to avoid me the following day when I invited her again! 

I appreciate that she did not cut me off even if I always gave her my version of the Sermon on the Mount. We were very concerned about her, so we spoke the truth, maybe sometimes bluntly. But there was love behind it. 

Many people may not know what she was going through. Because Mar was goofy, her natural reflex was to cover whatever pain she was in.   

More than anything, apart from honoring Marian publicly for the last time, I would like to say that her life, although teeming with unfavorable situations, was a true manifestation of how God's grace worked. God rescued her from death, and showered her with blessings --- the greatest of which is Cadi. A person who was weak and limited in many aspects, tainted in various ways, God used for His glory. 

So if you're experiencing the harshness of life, remember how God delivered Marian from her many predicaments. More than her voice and talent, let's look at her life and God's overflowing grace over her. May we be inspired by God moving in the lives of people like Mar. 

Let's admire Marian. But let's look at Jesus even more, the One who deserves all the praises in her life.       

Tuesday, April 30, 2024

First Year as Residents in The Netherlands

Nope. That's not our new house in the background. *wishing* hahaha


Three Dutch companies. One house. One apartment soon. A few Dutch cities. One more EU country.

That's our Netherlands life in a year so far. I could add: lots of servings of appeltaarts, poffertjes, pannenkoeken, frikandels, friets, kibbelings, etc. 


Several buses, trains, and plane rides.


A handful of good people from the church and our workplaces. Not to forget our four friends' sleepovers and one game day with pals. 


And behind all these, One loving and constant God. That's always the best part. We always pray that wherever life takes us, as long as He is there, we are OK. I know about His omnipresence. But to genuinely know it is to experience it.


As we move on to our second year, more await us. This involves transitions, breakthroughs, and crossroads.


Life may not be rosy (or to be Dutch, "tulips-y" hahaha) forever. Whether we are in The Philippines, Malaysia, or The Netherlands, we still get to realize this. As long as faith and love exist, we will be OK. God always sees us through.


I must confess I do not know if we will still live here a few years from now. But I am sure that we always bloom where God plants us. That is always my hope.


So, wait for our next adventure. More will be added to our personal statistics.





Tuesday, January 2, 2024

Six Life Lessons from Death

 

Death by chocolate? Chocolate skull from a chocolate museum in Antwerp.

Whenever we face mortality, that of ours or of those we know or close to us, we reflect on the opposite of it: LIFE.

As I gleaned on the lives that transitioned to the next, starting from my dad's passing in 2017, death has taught me these (or reminded me of what I knew but kept forgetting):

1. God is the end-all and be-all, the Sovereign One who holds time. It is not in our hands. Therefore, who should we trust? Our fragile minds and bodies or the One who created them?

2. The living deserves respect as much as the dead. We keep saying, "Respect the dead." But shouldn't we be more respectful of those around us who are still interactive and can respond? If we can't be kind, at least we can apologize to the living ones we offended. We must prefer that we pay respects and kindness all the time. Not at the last minute.

3. This world is not our home. So why do we chase temporary satisfaction? We have another permanent residence waiting when we are done with our purpose.

4. Simplify your life. Overanalyzing shortens our already short time on earth. Instead of thinking it over and over and complicating the overly complex wiring of our brains, the best decision stems from answering the basics: Who do you live for? Why do you do or want to do it? Will you have peace? Will your decision disobey God?

5. Say your "I love you", "sorry", and "thank you" when appropriate. Tomorrow is not guaranteed for you or your recipient.

6. Love the ones you're with. God planted them there for a reason. Just like He put you in their lives.


Just a few days ago, I was shocked after receiving the news that a former colleague and once close friend passed away. We used to do major projects together and enjoyed staging those big and small outreaches countrywide. People in the office knew that we were each other's sidekicks. We became estranged when I retired but managed to reconnect when the pandemic hit. It's one thing I'm happy we did. We chatted once in a while after that. When I revisited the Philippines last year, I was supposed to visit her before her surgery. We were chatting hours before her surgery and when she woke up after. The hospital's policies didn't allow more than one companion. The time came when I had to leave the Philippines again. Little did I know it would be our last major chat.

She was young. Full of life. But her time came. 

I hope that each of us, young or old, will not only focus on life. Death has its voice that we should hear to wake us up to a reality that we always forget will come to us sooner or later.

  

         

Fallout Girl: It's Not You, Its Me

 

Looking to (do) the right (thing).

I call myself the "fallout girl" for a reason. I noticed that I am good at making friends despite being an ambivert. The only problem is that many of the friendships I form tend to fall away after a certain period, a few years, or even decades. That is for many various reasons, mostly shallow. 

Most often, I consider myself a misunderstood human being. Whenever I think of this, I wallow in my solitude and, sometimes, weeping silently. Yeah, overdramatic, I know! But it happens occasionally during bouts of hormonal imbalance (or during that time of the month)! 😁😁 

I try fighting off that feeling and thought by praying, asking God, and engaging in humorous conversations with my husband and son. If they're not around, I read or watch something funny. These habits affect me positively because I can cultivate my wit and sense of conversational humor. Then again, it's to enhance my people skills.

Returning to the concept of falling out, I got the urge to write about it after discovering (again) that a couple of FB (former) friends had unfriended me. The consolation is at least they did not block me. In this situation, I don't know why. As far as I know, I did not do anything offensive. We used to be close at work and had many collaborations. But yes, we have grown silent toward each other after leaving my former office. I assume (yes, typical of me) that some rumors may have fueled this cold treatment, that I do not meet their friendship standards. It's a long story stemming from my recommendation to fire an unruly subordinate. That subordinate was a close friend of one of these people who unfriended me. It's a sad narrative, the best and only reason I know.

I can go on telling stories about friends who used to be close to me but have veered away. I can also tell things about interesting new people and friends who remain in close contact despite the distance and time difference, and I know they still appreciate me as I am.

But why am I more disappointed in those who are not that close but I had a falling out with? Rejection hurts. Maybe I am still not tough enough to accept that friends change. I should remember that it does not only happen to me. It happens to the best of us, to those who are gold medalists in the people arena. But still, it's disappointing! And I only blame myself for why I am not good at it. Why I am a "fallout girl." 

It's good that I have a strong family foundation and a husband who enlightens me on issues and rebukes me lovingly. If not, I may have fallen into the pit of social sadness. 

Social media has an impact on this. I'm not exactly a Facebook superstar, and many of my posts only go so far. It's not that I want to be popular or deeply affected by the analytics. It's just tiring to see the fakeness of most posts, so to speak. The worst part is I have an opinion about many of what I read. This means I tend to be critical (if you want to say judgmental) and end up sinning. So, this year, I'll start minimizing my online activities on Facebook. The best I could do is post one or a couple of stories. I wanted to deactivate it, but I handle various accounts for work and other purposes. Sadly.

Again, this is the most candid I could be. If you have any comments or advice, I'd appreciate it. 

Starting the year not overthinking, being happier, wittier, healthier, sweeter, and more loving toward others. With God's help, I know I can say, "It's not me. It's Him." 


 

  



Monday, December 25, 2023

Our First Dutch Christmas






Never have we imagined that we'd be spending a Christmas as residents here in The Netherlands. We were happy to be in Asia for this season. But God has other plans. 

As I grow older, and as I shared in our Christmas family devotional last night, I want to have simpler Christmases from now on. Growing up, a big company of friends and family surrounded me. We would feast on Christmas delicacies and specialties. 

In the past couple of years, now that we have our family and living abroad, it has become more solemn and quieter. I can't just say I like the change. But it is good. It reminds me of the message of the first Christmas, the uncomplicated quiet time when and where Jesus was born.  

Like I said in my travel blog, I'm still trying to get used to this Dutch Christmas set-up. We'll see if we'll travel to another city or country for Christmas. Still simple, but maybe livelier.

For our Noche Buena, we played card games and then watched Oppenheimer! Haha! What a Christmas movie, right? 

Then, at 11 pm, while the food was baking, we did our family devotional, a yearly Christmas tradition. We exchanged gifts afterward. 

At midnight, we savored the simple feast I prepared consisting of store-bought chicken roulade, vegan "beef" Wellington, black Angus bitterballen, Cinnabon's cinnamon rolls, and chocolate ice cream. (I loved our light dinner. I cooked oats caldo for me and normal arroz caldo for the boys.)

Some days before Christmas, we visited Bataviastad, an outlet shopping complex in Lelystad, North Holland. The week before that, we went to a Christmas market in Haarlem with friends from our church. It was crowded, long, and winding. But the company is good. 

The Netherlands has glittery Christmas markets. It's a matter of choosing where you want to go. And if you want to spend a bit more. 

That's it for now. This short respite enabled me to sit down and recall some moments that made a mark this year. Next week, it's back to work again. I hope to write some more in the coming days.  



 

Friday, May 19, 2023

Today, I Beat the Weighing Scale

 




50.6!

Beat that, weighing scale! 😀That's my weight in kilograms as of today. Last week I was 51.9.

The scale has not been friendly for the past years. Until I finally almost reached my ideal of 50 kg after attempting in 2019, when my doctor advised me to get rid of a minor fatty liver.

The road was not easy, especially when you lived in a multicultural country whose staple foods are delectable. I had to eat smart with noodles and dumplings, my favorites. 

So, today I'm celebrating with ice cream! Haha! 

Kidding aside, here are some of the steps I took to take control of a healthy lifestyle:

1. Since February 2 this year, I've begun using Noom (a calorie-counting app). I used to see calorie counting as tedious. I got curious if it could work out. Now I know it's effective because you become conscious of what to eat next or how you will plan your workout for the day.

2. Movement is medicine. I've been following the program of Hasfit.com (low-impact and easy workouts). I wrote about this in my previous blog. I combine it with some dance workouts on YouTube, walking, and even house-cleaning for at least one hour. I see to it that I have four to five days of activity each week.

3. I read about the 70/30 rule. The seventy represents the majority of healthy food you have to include in your daily meals. The 30 is the rest of whatever you want to eat, or the room for that unplanned lunch, dinner, or pizza night. The idea is to avoid excessive consumption of unhealthy food. 

4. Mediterranean meals. My food is composed of greens, nuts, beans, and fruits. I make sure to include oatmeal in my breakfast or snack. I also eat chicken and fatty fish that are not cooked in oil or just a little of it. Olive oil does the job, but in small quantities, too. Bottomline is, be a liver lover.

Don't get me wrong. On weekends, I eat a meal that I like. If I feel guilty after eating something "sinful", I walk and get some fresh air. :-)         

All these may not work out for everyone. But a little bit of any of these might work. What's important is we are intentional and disciplined to live better.


Share your best practices by commenting here. It is always good to share health-focused ideas and ways. (I am not endorsing any products here, please note. 😁)



Wednesday, November 2, 2022

Life's Foggy Like That

 

Foggy at 7 PM near my son's apartment. I thought it is snowing already.

Sometimes, life presents a clear vision of what you are now and what's up ahead. However, there are times when life is foggy. Everything seems unclear. 

With many decisions in the offing, you find yourself which one/s to choose, which road to take, or which ones to avoid. The good thing is, before you know it, you have already passed through it. Things naturally happen on its own. It could be like that or you are too preoccupied too notice the change the process brings.

Maybe the long-term foggy season is why some of the people in my life, mostly family, were not able to make wise life decisions. This, in the long run, paved the way to all their miseries. As a person who cares so much about their well-being and life status, I could only pray and cry silently as I empathize. There is nothing much I could do. I support them in the way that I can, in any other form. But the power to change the whole course of their lives sits on their mindset. I believe God has reached out to them many times. Heardened hearts would only hear what they want to hear.

As I reflect on what's happening to them, I could only wish that somehow, they could also benefit from the same kind of joy that I have. It is not material-driven. It is not situational. Even if I have my own troubles, doubts, and fears, it is very reassuring that God is with me through it all. I often think about this for them because I care. 

Life is not fair. But we all have a part in it. How we respond to situations, how we plan, how we involve God in our daily lives --- those are the important parts. In the end, it is always between you and God. Let's not waste our lives trying to be our own gods. We must all admit that we are powerless and there is a more powerful Being whom we have to answer to when our time is up.

As for my brother and sister, who are undergoing so much pain, unhappiness, and deep bondage to sin, I hope, pray, and sincerely want you to reach a life breakthrough that would make you realize the majesty and glory of our Lord. He will never forsake anyone who loves to have a renewed life, here and in eternity. 



Wednesday, September 14, 2022

Diabetes Scare Meets a Mother's Prayer and a Faithful God

Daddy's boy




"Praise God! Thank God!"

Those were the first words that came out of my mouth when the doctor said my son is not diabetic.

To backtrack, a week ago, after downing a large tumbler of milk tea, my son suddenly experienced a series of hunger and thirst pangs. He said it was the first time it had happened to him. Those in the know would advise having him checked for diabetes. So, off we went to the doctor. At the clinic, true enough, the doctor suggested testing his blood for diabetes markers. 

It was the second longest wait of my life. The first one was when I was giving birth to him. While waiting for the lab results overnight, I would check my blood pressure. I was not surprised to see it was elevated than usual. I was thinking of the what-ifs. My mind was already racing to the next year of our lives. 

The first question I asked God was, "What message are you telling me?" I even told God, "What happened to my daily declaration of good health for my family in Your Name?" For just a little bit, I questioned Him, but at the same time told myself to turn this test into a testimony of His faithfulness.

Then I found myself back to surrendering the situation to Him, saying that we will just do what we can and must. We leave all the uncontrollable up to God. 

Then in my evening prayer time before sleeping, I told God to speak to me, that I am listening. As I opened the reading material, the title of the message came alive before my eyes: "God will heal your heart, mind, and body". To quote: Oftentimes, a person's waiting season is also a person's healing season." Then it went on: "While you are waiting on God, it is very important to recognize the areas in your life where you need to be healed. Healing is not just limited to physical healing. Healing can also take place in your mind... The Word of God is serving as your treatment. God is willing to provide you with everything you need to be healed. But you can't make God heal you the way you want to be healed. You have to allow God to heal you the way He wants to heal you. You must trust God and His process."  This last sentence appealed to me a lot.

Then It led me to Ecclesiastes 3:1-5. It is one of my four favorite books in the Bible. And the verse talks about seasons in life. Part of verse 3 says, "A time to kill, and a time to heal..."  

That's when I knew God demonstrated his realness to me. Quiet tears fell as I talked to Him. It was I that needed healing from worry. It robbed me of the time I was supposed to pray and trust more. Although it was for a little while, I felt its immediate impact. 

I woke up feeling differently. Something good is in store. All this time, my husband was calm and composed, seeing things matter-of-factly. He was confident that our son is not sick of the same disease that killed his dad. I can't blame him. EJ lives a healthy lifestyle and is very disciplined. He only eats potato chips on Saturday night. He does not like sweets. We serve balanced meals at home. He drinks three liters of water each day. He eats low glycemic parboiled rice. And so on and so forth. All this is because of the healthy habits we initiate at home.

After our morning breakfast and family devotion, we headed to the clinic for the moment of truth. There was no trace of yesterday's mourning. 

The doctor finally revealed the findings, "Your son is not diabetic." What's even greater is that all his test numbers are perfect (cholesterol, blood count, thyroid, kidney, liver, sugar, etc.). I would like to believe that a mother's prayer is always effective because I've seen that in the life of many, including mine. But a faithful God is the highlight of this event. God is real! God is true! Even if EJ's test turned out the other way, He still is faithful and true. Because at the end of each life here, we have hope for a better one. 

Now, with huge relief, we can say that we are flying to Europe this weekend without any shadow of doubt following us. 

I can't contain the joy that God brings. With or without these temporary earthly things, I'll keep trusting. (Philippians 4:7)

Sunday, May 22, 2022

Updated: COVID-19 Chronicles

 


(This was posted on the first day I tested positive.) 

Counting the days until I could do another test to see if I'm still infected. 

When my son had COVID in March, I knew that it was only a matter of time before any one of us would get it. So my turn came on a Saturday, May 21 (or when I found out I have it through a test). I, somehow, expected the result. 

It began with an unusual feeling of something being stuck in my throat, like a furball, haha! I felt it on Wednesday. I would wake up for two nights feeling warm. I would sweat, which was unusual. Then Friday morning came. I tested negative. But I noticed I was not improving. So, I tested again on Saturday night. That's when COVID showed up (photo above). 

I postponed a meeting scheduled for Sunday afternoon and did not attend church, where I was supposed to do photography for the service. 

My early symptoms are sore throat, followed by a cough and a cold. There would be occasional mild headaches, on-and-off low-grade fever (37.4 max), and slight body pains as if you spent the whole day at the gym. 

Up to now, my voice is still hoarse. Now, on Day 3/Day 4, I feel a bit better. 

I continue my regimen of drinking boiled fresh ginger (salabat) mixed with honey. This solved my cough issues and helped me in my sleep. I eat guava, squeeze pure calamansi, drink about three liters of water (a habit), and take a lozenge as a throat relief. I continue our usual supplements of vitamin C and Zinc.

I monitor my temperature and blood oxygen using an oximeter. We turn on our copper-infused air purifier the whole day so that my boys will not get the virus. We also keep our sanitizers handy.

Some of my friends had asked where and how I got COVID. It would be difficult to identify the source. My husband believes he got it from his office and transmitted it to me while he is asymptomatic. He confessed that he woke up on Wednesday feeling under the weather. After his morning exercise and shower, it was gone.

All in all, I could say that our bout with swine flu in 2020 was harder than COVID. The fever, chills, and coughing we experienced having swine flu were more intense. By the third day, we were completely healed. COVID viruses tend to stay longer.  

I will not end without attributing to Jesus the peace and calm I feel. I know, for sure, that He has been with me since the first day I got sick. Not only that, in the past, today, and in the future. He is my Healer, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

(And hey, vaccines work! Don't wait until you get COVID and suffer much worse symptoms.)

Update: The negative test result below indicates my husband's test today (his 7th day). We tested after waking up. Then we walked around the neighborhood (a three-kilometer or so walk) because he can finally go out and do his usual morning runs. Praise God for this! We had a simple celebratory lunch; and will have a celebratory weekend by watching Top Gun and eating out. Very much awaited! 

We both survived! 


Sunday, March 13, 2022

Our Time with COVID-19


It is often said that "it is not a matter of 'if' but 'when'." 

The first of March became a memorable time for us as a family. Just weeks before his birthday this month, our son contracted Covid-19. We suspect that he got it from the salon where he had his haircut. It was a Saturday. Then Tuesday night came when he slept earlier than usual because he was feeling dizzy with a headache.

This chronicles his journey with the virus. For this purpose, I begin Day 1 on a Tuesday evening.

Day 1, March 1 (Tues): With a headache, occasional mild cough disturbed sleeping 

Day 2, March 2 (Wed): With a slight headache, itchy throat, occasional mild cough, colds began late in the day, tested positive after breakfast using RTK, resting the whole day and skipped school, no medicine being given, had ginger tea and honey, usual vitamins (C, D), probiotics, and Zinc, 5 mg melatonin for sleep

Day 3, March 3 (Thurs): Still coughing mildly and occasionally, with colds and runny nose

Day 4, March 4 (Fri): Coughing less but still with colds and still no fever (temp. 35.3)

Day 5, March 5( Sat): Improvement noticed, nose still stuffy, temperature 35.8, still no medication except for usual vitamins and supplements, including melatonin, tested negative using the RTK, but we still observed until the seventh day after another test

Day 6, March 6 (Sun): Improved sore throat and cold, still no fever, same intake of vitamins, supplements, and melatonin

Day 7, March 7 (Mon): He attended online classes already, coughing more frequently due to phlegm that wants to be expelled  

Day 8, March 8 (Tues): His test showed a blurry second line so we were unsure if it was + or -, coughing improved, overall health better, scheduled him to be out of quarantine the next day to be sure (instead of yesterday as per Health Department protocol of being out after the seventh day)

Since then, he has completely recovered. Praise God!


During those days, we were carefully practising all sanitary protocols and quarantine procedures.

My husband tested negative on March 3 (Thurs), March 5 (Sat), and March 12 (Sat).

I tested negative on March 2 (Wed), March 4 (Fri), and March 12 (Sat).


We consider it God's divine protection that my husband and I did not get it at all despite the floor area of our condo unit (almost 1000 sq ft). It's a good thing that our son has his own toilet in his room. And that his mom is a germophobe and has OCD. Hahaha!

Seriously, we are just so thankful that God has heard our prayers to make it just mild symptoms if any of the three of us would catch it. True enough, it was in our son's case. He did not have a fever. I was observing him carefully because he has mild asthma. 

Our prayer remains that my husband and I would still not contract Covid-19 for us to continue working and looking out for the family.

Lastly, this proves that vaccines help, coupled with a lifestyle of good health habits. Our son has completed his shots with a booster.

Let's use what God has provided us with to fight this pandemic in our households.


PS: Thanks to our friends who prayed with us, sent us fruits, and even gave us a 'Covid cash allowance' (though we did not ask for it)! Hahaha! 


 

Saturday, February 26, 2022

Life Lessons from a Wobbly Tooth


Another one of my wisdom teeth bites the dust. After two decades of trying to protect them from losing another member, I let go of this one. A total of two molars were lost. The first one was after giving birth to my son, my so-called sacrificial tooth or the victim of calcium loss during pregnancy. 

Weird as it may sound, but I like every trip to the dentist for my regular cleaning and polishing. While some dread the mere sight of the clinic signboard, it is the opposite for me. After leaving the clinic, I'd have this satisfying feeling that my pearly whites are, indeed, pearly whites that are free from the stains of the morning and evening tea, and dark chocolate bars/drinks.

I complained to the dentist that I had been sleepless for two nights because of the pain the third molar caused. Despite the throbbing ache, I was upbeat. I was imagining the relief once the tooth is out. My dentist checked the shaky tooth, and he confirmed what I was looking forward to. I had to say goodbye to that troublesome tooth.   

Anyway, the real story began when I sat on the dental chair. I thought injecting the anesthesia was the tormenting part. My dentist applied the anesthetics five times instead of two. The pain I felt with every move of the tooth extractor was unbearable. I never felt this when I had a tooth extraction the first time. Hence, the added anesthetics. My knee was jerking every time I would hear the cracking of my tooth with the left-and-right swinging of that dental tool inside my numb mouth. The dentist would stop every now and then because he said he was worried. Haha! 

I was not worried. "Horrified" was the better word. The experience was totally unexpected. I never gave in to fear, though. During that ordeal, I decided to sing in my head a hymn that I sang when I had a health issue years back. I would sing this as well every time my blood pressure monitor would show elevated numbers. I was sort of meditating on a dental chair with Turn your Eyes upon Jesus playing in my head. No kidding, but it does wonders every time. 

Then a realization about pain came. Pain is inevitable. It comes, but it also goes. The real clincher is what we do when we are in pain. Do we escape? Do we just go through with it? 

More importantly, who do we go to when we experience pain? In my life, going to God is a time-tested way to coast through pain. It is not a religious thing. It is something more personal. 

My desire for my loved ones, and for everyone, is the same. That we breeze through life by going to Jesus.

Going back to my wobbly tooth, the dentist finally showed it to me. I looked at it and felt a little "separation anxiety". That thing that caused my pain is now gone, but I felt a tinge of sadness. We are all like that sometimes. We unknowingly nurture the sources of our burdens and trouble. We'd only feel the relief after we give them up. That sadness was only for a minute. I became happy that I could sleep again unbothered by a wobbly tooth.

Now that's a life lesson.


Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full, in His wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace


  


Friday, December 31, 2021

My Update for 2022: New Year, New Leaf


We turn a new leaf, a new page, in our book called life as 2022 quietly arrives. I say quietly because literally, the bangs in the neighborhood were almost nil. There was only a couple of quick fireworks. Not complaining, though. I like the lights but not the noise.

Truly, 2022 is a spinoff of the bittersweet goings-on in 2021. We're still in the middle of an ever-evolving pandemic. Although there is a hint of normalcy, little by little. But without a doubt, we can still feel the fragility of the situation. 

On a spiritual level, 2021 has proven God's might once again. He can do anything. I just had to wait and see. The hard part, especially if waiting took so long. Patience is not one of my virtues growing old. But I did it with His help. 

I have started reading my favorite book in the Bible, Ecclesiastes. The man of great wisdom, King Solomon, wrote it. As I began reading the first chapter, his words still permeate, even though I already know what he is saying. I love how he stitches the words and the expression of his soul. Especially when you read about "the vanity of vanities." What he wrote all points to the glory of God.

Professionally, the last quarter ushers in new beginnings for me and my husband. He is starting with a new group, hailed as the best employer in the country. The company offered an unexpected package to his amazement and beyond what he asked for. As for me, I write for a foreign company, with a very convenient set-up for me. I am also set to start at another leading media group. I am excited about the latter, mainly because, as a storyteller, it is going to be a very new thing for me. I am also nervous at the same time as I think about that first report. Stick around. One day, you will hear or see my stand-upper. 

All these new things have come as breakthroughs. If you only knew how I prayed and waited. The same goes for my husband. All in all, there is no secret formula. It's just faith+patience+love. And all these things will be added unto you.

Christmas in a Pandemic



It's everybody's Christmas in a pandemic. But that should not stop us from celebrating Jesus.

It may be simple, but it's OK. You may be in a big life mess and feel that Christmas is not the right time to rejoice. 

Let's not forget one thing. It has never been about us. Although we indeed want to give gifts in this season of love and giving. The act is just a manifestation of the meaning of the occasion. 

It's always about the first coming of Christ. The ultimate act of love that the Father did. The ultimate example of giving came on that first Christmas day.

I want to reshare what I posted on my Facebook right after Christmas.

The Cabahuggables' reflection during our traditional Christmas Eve family devotion:
🌟 What if Jesus did not come as a baby but as an adult performing the miracles in His ministry? Would it still be called 'Christmas?'
🌟 Christmas is a season that our non-Christian friends also observe. Because they say that they like the "vibe" it creates, especially in this pandemic.
🌟 Christmas is the only time of the year that reflects an atmosphere of forgiveness, love, peace, joy, harmony, restoration, and all the many good things. As we get older, we know why. Those are the very same reason why God sent Jesus, and what Jesus embodies.
The commercialism of Christmas is good if it's a way to propagate the idea to non-Christians. But let us not get TOO focused on that. The centerpiece is the One born to save everyone.
PS: I just learned that Jesus was about two years old when the wise men discovered him. Contrary to the nativity scene commonly depicted.

Here's a video of how we spent some days during the holidays leading up to Christmas.

Friday, November 19, 2021

Why Social Media Birthdays are Overrated

Thanks to our Aussie friend for this great-tasting red wine

Because of Facebook birthdays reminders, it has become easy for many of us to remember birthdays and greet one another. If you recently celebrated your birthday (like me) and received many greetings, then great!

But what if you didn't put your birthday on Facebook (also me)? Here is when you know who truly remembers and cares to greet you by any means. I admit I don't remember all my friends' birthdays. But I know almost all the birthdays of my close friends. 

Yesterday, on my birthday, I saw only a handful of greeters. Some I saw when I first glanced on my phone. Others, about a few days before. I appreciate them deeply, especially those who truly know the day a birthday falls even without a Facebook reminder. A friend even said he put it on his phone as a reminder. Now that is effort! Another girlfriend did IG and FB shoutouts to my surprise. I was shy because of the attention it garnered. Mwehehe... This is not about keeping count. But this is about the reality that people forget or do not care that much; and that you must come to terms with it, overcome, and move forward still being friends with them.

I honestly don't know why I always have this thought every time our birthdays come. "Our" means my and my husband's. It's probably because we only keep to ourselves! Haha! And I, not my husband, become a bit reflective when some of my expectations fail. Maybe this is what getting older means. You become more sentimental and see who are still there over the years or who are now there. I felt this mostly these past two weeks as I was asking for testimonials from some people for a birthday tribute for a loved one. I am glad because a lot of them turned up to give their short but sweet effort. Some had valid and realistic reasons for not being able to produce one. But some plainly said they cannot or was not able to do it. This is REALITY. 

As a birthday reflection, with or without a Facebook reminder or birthday greetings from the world, what matters is that your immediate circle and family remember you. The most special and most important fact that you should appreciate is the ever-present love from God. It is the kind that never forgets, does not need a Facebook reminder, and is unconditional. 

Forgive me if I failed or will fail to greet you on your birthday. As I have forgiven you for mine.

I received so many blessings lately, a couple of those I had asked for years before my 2021 birthday. We also had an awesome out-of-town celebration. It will be in my next blog.

It's just so fantastic to be alive at 45! (There, I said my age! Haha!)

Sunday, November 14, 2021

How to Caffeinate your Husband

Watch this video about the first time I used a coffee machine. I came up with a cup of cappuccino for Cappuccino Day (November 8). Finish it to see my blooper in the ending.

Confession: I am not a coffee drinker. But because my husband has a special bond with coffee, whether it’s ice-cold or hot, I decided to learn how to make good cups of it, especially now that he works at home and coffee is his only perk during a day’s work.

For his birthday this year, I gave him a beginner’s coffee maker. Beginner, because in my case, it is a coffee newbie’s first “toy.” He loved the fact that I finally let go of our French press and replaced it with this more sophisticated one, although brandless. I was excited to unbox it. It came in weeks before his birthday, but we decided we should use it right away for practice. Haha!

Not only that, but I also enrolled in a basic coffee barista course. I made a video of it. Watch it here. Here are some of the photos:











Wednesday, July 28, 2021

Vaxxed! Why I Got the Jabs

 

July 6 was my first and the 27th was my last shot of the vaccine against COVID-19.

The world is polarized between vaccine believers and anti-vaxxers. There are lots of cringe-worthy arguments hanging around in a Mr. Bean fashion. Sorry to be blunt about it, but yes, I'll be straightforward about this. 

Fear of death. That is the most important reason why many people refused to get vaccinated, whether they admit it or not while displaying a straight-face to be courageous about it. While it's true that people who get the jabs are also afraid to die of COVID-19, not everyone has the same reason. I'll just present my arguments. 

I believe that getting the vaccine is being socially responsible. It's not just about one's life. It's about everybody's life. We're in a pandemic. Meaning, we are all living in a bubble of exponentially expanding infection that could start if one is not immune or at least has no significant percentage of immunity. My actions would impact a lot of lives, especially those around me. 

It's a scientific fact that those who are not immune are vulnerable not just to the infection, but also to be the vessels of mutation. That is the very reason why there are already different strains spreading. The space is so wide for these viruses to metamorphose into more invincible and more spreadable forms. If this alone could clear the foggy heads of the anti-vaccine folks, then this seemingly unending circulation of SARS-COV 2 could come to an end or at least weaken.

I have no right to force my beliefs. I also do not hate those who are not keen on getting the jabs. I'm just this desperate for this dragging season to end that I'd like to be heard and hopefully convince the anti-vaxxers to be mindful of others and be less selfish.

The argument that's been circulating in Christian communities that the vaccine is the "mark of the beast" is just too superstitious. I am stunned in disbelief. It's unbiblical. It is a very lame excuse to hide the fear of death if someone says that God is our protector so a vaccine is not necessary. If God can protect a Christian, then why fear getting the vaccine? I get the flu vaccine each year. I got vaccinated with boosters years ago. Does it mean I doubt God’s sovereign protection over me that I get medical intervention? Of course not! It just means that we are given the wisdom, science, technology, doctors, etc. that we could use for our good to take care of our health and bodies.

It’s true that if you trust God with your life, vaccine or no vaccine, you should not be afraid. But between the two options, getting the shots is the more socially responsible and biblical way of showing how you love your neighbor as yourself (which is the second most important commandment). Could you face the fact that a family member contracted the virus because you're a spreader? Take the jabs for yourself and those around you.

For more about why the vaccine is not the "mark of the beast," read this article.

Yes, a vaccinated person can still get COVID-19. But all studies have shown that the protection the vaccine provides is significant to avoid getting hospitalized, being in the ICU, or getting truly severe symptoms.

Also yes, that a vaccinated person, if infected, is still contagious. But all credible findings reveal that the vaccine serves its purpose in terms of lessening the infectivity. Moreover, it could only infect others if that vaccinated person is not carefully sanitizing or not wearing masks.

I don’t know how else to present the benefits of getting the vaccine at this crucial time in the world’s history. All I know is that my life is not in my hands. God can take me anytime. But I don’t want to be the person responsible for spreading something that could harm other people’s lives.

Saturday, July 17, 2021

Why I Don't Believe in "Happy Wife, Happy Life"

"...the cliche 'happy wife, happy life' does not apply to us.,, it is more of 'happy couple, for a joy that's double' for us. It works. Twenty years and counting." 



Simple. At home only. Food-filled. Thankful. My husband and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary this way. We were planning things before the pandemic, but I guess you know what is happening around.

One of the plans was to go to Tagaytay Royale and have a simple renewal of vows before our closest family and friends. My husband said that if we cannot pull it through, we can do it on the silver anniversary instead. I think he's right because it will require a lot of coordination here and there, and we're not in the Philippines to do that. Besides, I need to practice dancing Dynamite as my special number for him. That's heavy work! Hahaha! 

Another option was to celebrate it somewhere, with just us. Some destinations in Switzerland, Malaysia, South Korea, the U.S., Australia, and Japan came to mind. If I were to choose, I'd go for this one. I've been dying to go places again and blog about them. Whereas for my husband, I believe he needs a breather from all the pressures of work for the past couple of years.

But reality check, the plan did not pan out because of the pandemic. Our hands are tied. There's no room to do something extraordinary. We're stuck with the everyday routine for the past year and a half. And it seems there is very little progress. 

I'm not saying we're in dire straits. It's just that, it's our second time to celebrate our anniversary with the SARS-COV2 virus still around. How selfish of me to think of this when many of our health care workers are burdened each day. That is, to say the least. I know even my own words won't suffice to describe what they are going through right now. 

Nevertheless, it dawned on me that what is important is the gift of health and still being together to celebrate our 20th, albeit simply. I'm still grateful. A crab and seafood feast did wonders. My husband is a no-qualms man. Anything goes. He knows how complicated things are these days. At the back of my head, I'm thinking spa and a two-hour massage. But that is wishful thinking. 

Craaaaabs!

Seafooood lunch from Yamaguchi Fish Market.

Too lazy to cook for dinner. So we ordered from DoubleTree. Its signature cookie is the star.

Before we called it a night, we watched Arthdal Chronicles with Mykori's ice-shaved chocolate-flavored dessert. 

Mykori is addicting. Reminds us of bingsu.

Before I close this post, I just want to add that the cliche "happy wife, happy life" does not apply to us. When you enter a life with your spouse, it means two different people being united by commitment and effort to make each other happy. It's not just the husband's or the wife's role to find ways towards happiness. In my point of view, I think that as a wife, I must be intentional in making my husband happy. I'm very sure he has this perspective, too. Otherwise, our marriage won't last two decades. It will be very unfair, and very selfish to think that only one party has to think of the other's happiness. It is the duty of both the man and the woman.  

Having said that, it is more of "happy couple, for a joy that's double" for us. It works. Twenty years and counting.




     



Wednesday, June 30, 2021

Health, Fitness, and Me

As my online fitness coach, Joshua Kozak (of Hasfit.com), always says, "A winner was once a beginner."

Before you get the JLo or Henry Cavill body, it will take a lot of effort and self-discipline. I'm sure this is not the first time you heard of this. But whatever your fitness goals are: whether it's to attain a svelte or muscular figure or to be physically active and healthy, it is important to have an effective workout regimen. Not only that, there has to be a diet that works for you, too. One that is compatible with your existing medical condition, if you have any. I'm no nutritionist or dietitian. That is one of my aspirations, though. I'd like to take on a nutrition and fitness course. But that is another story.

I began being weight- and health-conscious since I was in sixth grade. Other kids would tease me for my chubbiness. So when I turned 12, I decided to lessen my rice intake. (I think this was the reason why I am the shortest among us, siblings. My youngest bro is almost 6', and the other bro is about 5' 7". My sis stands at 5' 4".)  In less than a month, I lost a lot of weight! I was happy with the result, so I kept on going with the less-rice plan. I loved bread, and our house would always have different kinds of bread from the neighborhood bakers. So every time I'd snack on bread, I would rest for 30 minutes and do my abs workout for the next 30 minutes. Grabe, right? 

To cut a long story short, I continued my less-rice plan. Until eventually, I stopped eating rice for as far as I can remember. I still do not include rice in my staple food. I substitute it with couscous in small portions or Job's tears (adlai). I know. These are not conventional, especially the latter grain variety. But I believe I should invest in my food. Lately, I use oatmeal as my "rice" and eat it with whatever viand there is. It's mostly fish (salmon and milkfish usually). I only eat chicken twice a week and in small portions. The bulk of my meal would compose of vegetables. I eat fruits and nuts as snacks.

Don't get me wrong. I also eat what I crave during the week, but I reserve it on weekends. I have a "cheat" meal and dessert. This is good for your mental health. :-D

Here are some modifications and practices I observe when it comes to my health:

1. Extra virgin olive oil only and use sparingly. I use the air fryer most of the time. No to hydrogenated oils, palm oils, and other forms of oils other than extra-virgin olive oil.

2. Workout at least 30 minutes four to five times a week. I'm currently into HIIT (high-intensity interval training). But I also run sometimes, dance the Zumba, or do some cardio and abs workouts.

3. Go to bed at 10 pm. Ok, fine, at 10:30 pm after watching our favorite K-drama. I try not to use my phone when in bed already.

4. No to sodas and juices that are sweetened. It's a good thing that even as a child, I never liked the taste of sodas. They give my tummy a different feeling, the same way with coffee. 

5. Read the label. Check the salt and sugar content. It's a red flag for me if I see that the salt exceeds the 100 mg per serving limit. As for the sugar, I only take maltitol, erythritol, lakanto, molasses, and coconut sugar. Also, no to aspartame and other kinds of harmful sweeteners. Sugar and salt are important, but these two should be consumed sparingly.

6. Sourdough bread instead of ordinary white bread. Sometimes I eat wheat bread. But with my son's IBS, I now go for bread that is low-gluten or gluten-free. 

7. I cook and bake often. This way, I know how the food is prepared or what the ingredients are. I tend to be choosy in the restaurant, too.

8. Steam, broil, bake, or pan-roast. Fry rarely.

9. Fast food once in a while. It's not our go-to meal.

10. I drink only unsweetened plant-based milk (almond, oat, soy, cashew, etc.). This way, we can avoid carrageenan, BHT, high salt, sugar, lactose, and other ingredients in milk that are not good.

11. To cap the night, I drink hibiscus or lemon-ginger tea. Drink them when you feel that you just had a fatty, oily, salty, or sweet meal. These are good for the immune system, too.

12. Load your plates with different kinds of veggies. Make sure they are good and won't affect any digestive issues. 

13. Hydrate! We keep drinking lots of water at home. I put slices of cucumber or lemon in the pitcher.

14. Since COVID-19 is still around, we take vitamins C and D, Zinc, and for my son, probiotics. I eat kimchi regularly to get my probiotics.

15. I totally removed beef from my diet when I turned 40. Although I eat beef tendons for collagen when I have pho. Pork has been non-existent in my diet since college. But on random days, I eat the pork rind I make (that's like once to twice a year). 

16. The key is always to eat and have whole foods. No to canned goods or those high in preservatives. If we eat it, it's very rarely we do. 

17. The only "junk food" in the house are those snacks that are unsalted or low salt, free from hydrogenated oils, unsweetened or low sugar. I go for 70% dark chocolates as long as it's dairy- and sugar-free. I snack up on nuts, fruits, and seeds.

18. I drink 250 ml. of wheatgrass first thing in the morning before any food or beverage intake. It's a superfood with many great health benefits.

I know, I know! This may look hard to do. But trust me, it was only in the beginning. I must admit, it was not that hard for me. Many of these practices were started since I was young. So there was no withdrawal syndrome. The beef part was hard at first because I used to eat that a lot. My dad cooked a variety of beef dishes because he loved them, too.  

My dedication to being good to my body began way back. But to be better at it began when I was diagnosed with hypertension at 38. People who know me were shocked because they know I am a healthy eater and physically active. My cardiologist said that it's due to genetics. Both of my parents have heart and blood pressure issues.

I also remember the Biblical point of taking care of our bodies. I am a vehicle to do God's work while I am alive. This is also what He gave to perform the calling and the job that He has given us. 

I tried a vegan diet also. I do that from time to time. But what I find sustainable in the long run is the Mediterranean diet. I am making it a lifestyle. It's easier to follow, and most of the food in it is readily available. 

Anyway, whatever floats your boat! What's important is the effort you put in to make a healthy version of yourself. Sometimes I fall off the wagon. There are days when I want to just be on the couch, watch Netflix, and eat whatever I want. But that does not mean I should stop. I stand back up again and push with a healthy lifestyle. 

I am two kilograms away from my ideal weight. The good thing is, it's been like that for a long time and does not go up. It is hard to shed it off. But I'm not giving up.

Arm yourself with information, consult the experts, and be friendly to your body. It's the only one you have. There is no better time to be strong than now.


(What do you think of my experience? Share your diet thoughts and comments below, please.)

   
 

Thursday, June 3, 2021

Friends: The Reunion in the Eyes of a Devotee

Where is Gunther? 
"My eyes! My eyes!"

Borrowing Phoebe Buffay's famous line, my eyes had both tears of laughter and of sadness as I watched Friends: The Reunion. It was a long-time longing. As Friends "devotees," as we call ourselves, my husband and I set aside what we were doing that day to catch the premiere streaming of the show. When the pandemic kicked in last year, we had a Friends marathon at home to divert our attention from the health crisis. (That and K-dramas.)

Watching the reunion, I felt as if the past started coming back. I recalled the time when I would hurry home from work in Makati to catch the show. It was a terrible feeling if traffic was bad because it would mean I would miss an episode. We did not have cable TV, so I was relying on its free-TV airing on TV5. Eventually, I collected all 10 DVDs that I left in the Philippines. Sadly.

I appreciated the fact that the cast never got tired of their friendship. Recalling their beginnings and how they quickly rose to fame after a season, it is truly the magic of their authentic bond that made the show legendary. I could relate to what they were going through at that time. I am a Generation-X young pro when Friends' influence was at an all-time high. The real adulting was happening back then. I could identify with Monica, being obsessed with order, tidiness, and competitiveness. But I also felt what Rachel had to deal with when it comes to being independent, cutting the umbilical cord from her parents. I love Phoebe's humor and her inclination to music (guitar, like me!). I used to imagine myself and my posse living under one roof. It happened, but not for a long time. It was fun. Like what the show said, there will come a time when you truly have to be separated. Instead, we satisfied ourselves by spending many Saturdays and Sundays together, cooking together, watching together, playing games together, sleeping over, all in one home. 

The acting credits belong to the gang. They gave justice to the roles and put them to life. But the whole idea, the lines, the concept, and the casting, were perfectly executed by the brainy writers. I saw some table-reading and brainstorming sessions from one of the many Friends videos online. I am impressed at how they made things excellently from start to finish. Marta Kauffman, David Crane, and Kevin Bright were brilliant (and that word falls short of the best description).

During the reunion, I am deeply touched by the man-on-the-street interviews they did. These are common people who have been impacted by the show. One of them talked about being in a deep depression with suicidal tendencies but was comforted by Friends. Yes, the actors and the writers do not know us on a personal level. But the power of the medium they used to effectively touch the lives of the audience is noteworthy. 

If there was one thing I would like to see in the reunion, it would be to have more extrapolations. They talked about it at some point, predicting what they are now after 17 years. But it would be great to see them acting it out or doing table readings with new funny three-minute dialogues. This is to see them throwing witty lines at each other while proving that the charisma has not vanished all throughout the years. Also, the spin-off, Joey, was not mentioned. I was hoping that somehow, Matt Le Blanc would say something about it even as a joke.

I was expecting other big-named guests such as Bruce Willis, Jon Favreau, Ben Stiller, Winona Ryder, Elle Macpherson, and of course, Brad Pitt. When I saw Justin Bieber's, and Cara Delevingne's names, I wondered about their connection to the show. Then after seeing many reviews online, I learned that Justin Bieber is a big fan. I do not know about Cara Delevingne. Nevertheless, the line-up was OK. The BTS part was a bit disappointing with their very minute appearance. The director forewarned us in a Tweet, though.

I was also hoping that they did not cut James Michael Tyler's, aka Gunther, part in the special where he appeared only via Zoom. He almost did not have lines early on in the show's 10-year run and was only given some lines during the later years. In the reunion, it was like history repeating itself.  

All in all, it is still best to have a reunion, albeit short. The fanatic in me would never be satisfied and wanted to see more of the group. But it is still OK. 

So here I am channeling my inner Phoebe. I was inspired to study Smelly Cat's chords and made this video for this reunion season. This version is dedicated to all the street cats roaming around my former village. Never had one because it is smelly (my inner Monica speaking here). Hahaha! 



Cheers to the Friends: The Reunion special! It has awakened the sleeping giant of a fan in many of us.